Following a Legacy?

Hello everybody!



Note: I am sorry I haven't been able to update this blog as much as I wanted, now that I have a few minutes to spare...(I have been so bad at keeping up with e-mails...sorry ^__^; )

Please bear with me, this is going to be a long blog update and Josey: Thanks for recommending the book, Eric Thanks for getting me a copy of "The Case for Faith" I'll be busy reading a lot of books over the break ^__^

A lot has happened in the weeks that I have not been able to update this blog. I have been doing a lot of thinking. I have yet again been focusing my attention on what my faith means and unknowingly I stumbled across the fact that I carried a legacy of sorts....and maybe God did finally speak, maybe not. I'd like to think he has spoken.

So here is my story:

A few weeks ago one question was asked: "Why do you believe in God?"

Now I originally thought it was a simple question. Why? You'd think that anybody who believes in something ought to have a reason for it...some reason that was lost to me.

The gears in my head have been spinning and I tried to analyze what I am dealing with at the time...I haven't been able to figure it out.

I asked my friends because I was stumped and many people have given me personal answers. I usually think I have a pretty good idea of things happening for a reason, but this one got me thinking so much I had headaches and I sometimes even have to take a break from going to Cantonese CCF and English CCF just so I could spend time to think about something else.

Upon quiet reflection I found that I was able to understand my own friends from the two CCF groups a lot better: I knew partly why some of my friends believe in God...not the full answer but it was at times funny, sometimes it was serious and there are times that even I was moved by what I heard and observed.

I am usually very talkative... but once I am in a group setting sometimes I manage to be totally shy and at times I seemingly was able to be totally open. Sometimes I am a very quiet observer, I can read feelings between people (No, I may know about it but it doesn't mean I have to act like it).

Most of the time it made me wonder: Is there more to life in terms of faith? And while I know the answer is yes, I then ask myself: If there is more to life, what could that be?

I finally decided to ask my parents as to why they believed in God. They gave me an answer, an answer that I wrote an entire Sociology essay on 4 years ago: "religiosity and Society: Can religion be analyzed as a science in sociology?"

I still remember my thesis: I felt that sociology is a science in the deductive sense and that when mixed with religion it did not make a sound science, that is, religion I felt was merely a peace of mind...what my professor at the time felt was " a need to prepare for death/afterlife"

But as a sociology student I believed in using qualitative analysis: which means the description and research of subjects using a personal approach "Symbolic Intereaction"...which as the name implies: involves understand your subject by direct observation and interaction, in my paper I originally argued, that religion exists and serves a function as purely a social network.

My parents answer: "Religion is a way that we interact with others, if you have friends in certain religions you might follow that friend to that specific religion...but religion is much deeper than that, even deeper than friendship of which it can be a basis, think of it as philosophy son, and by the way, don't think too much, it isn't healthy."

And like them I found my faith to be deeper. Something that tugs right at your heart. It was funny, I met up with a friend, Evie yesterday for dinner before the CCF meeting and we were both discussing our own issues with faith, trying to see if we face the same struggles with faith and how we go about putting doubts to rest.

I understand how better to understand what my religion means to me: it is my compass and it is my shield.

Note to Evie: you might have thought that I was for some reason inspiring and Thank You. Believe me, if anything you are more of an inspiration to me, than I was to you.

You were right, God really does put people in our lives for a reason, and as a result of that, I was able to understand you and many other people.

Here is the funny part: That night Evie, Lue and ChengTRON* and myself have our Bible Study group and we read from the books of Matthew, Romans and we got to the book of John...moments ago Evie and myself were talking about the exact same topic at dinner so the following is what gave me a shock...

Specifically John, chapter 14 verses 5-14: (I had a Student Bible, NIV version: with the heading "Jesus the Way to the Father")

14:5, "Thomas said to him, ' Lord we don't know where you are going, so how we know the way?' "

14:6, " Jesus answered: ' I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the father except through me...

14:7, " ...If you really knew me, you would know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him."

14:8, " Philip said: ' Show us the Father and that will be enough for us' "

14:9, "Jesus answered: 'Don't you know me Philip? Even after I have been among you for such a long time? Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say 'show us the Father?' "

14:10,"...Don't you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you are not just my own. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work."

^14:11"...Believe me when I say that I am in the Father and the Father is in me; or at least believe on the evidence of the miracles themselves...."

14:12 ^"...I tell you the truth, anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father. "

14:13 "...And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father. ^"

14:14 "...You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it. "

As we go along, ChengTRON* says: "Thomas it looks like you carry a legacy...wow"

to which Evie says: "Wow...Thomas I think God is trying to tell you something...what do you think?"

Lue says: "So what do you think Thomas?"

Then Evie read the Biography notes of "Thomas the Disciple" below the passage out loud:

"BETWEEN THE STUBBORN SKEPTICISM AND HONEST questioning there is a huge gap, and the disciple named Thomas illustrates the difference. Popularly known as "Doubting Thomas" this disciple stands out for his practical honesty, not for his unbelief.

When Jesus' friend Lazarus died, Thomas frankly showed his despondency along with his intense loyalty to Jesus: " Let us also go (to Lazarus grave) so that we may die with him" (11:16). At Jesus' last meal with his disciples, he expressed the confusion that is surely on everyone's minds (14:5). Thomas never pretended. If he didn't understand something, he said so; if he felt discouraged he acted like it."

Evie then read more: " Thomas got his reputation as a doubter primarily because of his reaction to Jesus' resurrection he simply insisted: "I need to see it for myself" The implications of a risen Jesus were too great he believed to take someone else's word for it...Jesus honoured his honest doubt and visited him in person to offer proof...Thomas' questions led to faith because he expressed them sincerely and looked for answers. The last mention of him in the Bible show Thomas not questioning but praying...waiting with other disciples for the Holy spirit to come (Acts 1:12-14)"

(The Student Bible, 1996 NIV edition P.1121).

of course you can guess my reaction: I was sitting there completely stunned by the fact that I was just talking to Evie about it and how close it resembled my own skepticism. At the same time ChengTRON* says to me: "Thomas if that wasn't talking to you...I don't know what does"

All I can say is: This is probably the most incredible set of circumstances EVER. I am still shaken by it a little. But it made me think yet again.

Note to ChengTRON*: Cheng, you have changed the way I will look at Transformers Posters forever: Thanks to your nickname, now I will proceed to bug Mike. Y and ask him every time I go to Westcourt: " Mike where is the Autobot named ChengTRON*?"

I think I will start my conversations with Cheng like this from now on:

Thomas: "Oh great, now you got me thinking you can transform into something"

Cheng: " Autobot Transform!--wait--what do I transform into?"

Thomas: " I dunno...you can transform into chunks?"

Cheng: "Oh what a crappy superpower to have...I transform into chunks...wait...chunks of what?"

Thomas: *Pauses for a long time with the joke still not sinking in*
"I was thinking blocks...but, hey...No...OMG! I am not touching that one! ...AHHHH! ...no...AHHHH!"

Oh. Boy.

Until next time!

TKO ^__^;